Mean Witches
by LionsAndSnakes
Summary: Hermione Granger was a muggle-schooled girl and the daughter of two muggle parents. When she finally moves to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, she finds it a lot harder to fit in than it seemed. With Ginny and Neville, who was almost too gay to function, to back her up, will she ever defeat the Slytherins, Pansy, Astoria and Millicent to get her man, Draco Malfoy?
1. Chapter 1

**_A:N/ Hey guys! So this is the Wizarding take on the classic film Mean Girls. It's also Dramione themed. I hope you enjoy it, it's a lot harder to convert than you'd think._**

**_I would also like to make it clear; _**

**_I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE HARRY POTTER CHARACTERS OR THE STORY LINE TO MEAN GIRLS._**

**_Enjoy._**

* * *

_Chapter One._

Mr Granger was stood on Platform 9 ¾, taking a photo of Hermione and her mother with a muggle camera. It was Hermione's first day at Hogwarts, having never attended a wizard school before, she was a little nervous.

"That's good," her Dad said, "Stay close."

At that moment, Hermione's mum burst into tears.

"My baby's going to school!" she cried.

Hermione smiled, comforting her mother. She really ought not to worry so much. She guess it was natural for parents to cry on their kid's first day of school. But this usually happens when the kid is five. Hermione was 15, and until today, she attended muggle-school. That meant muggle teachers were the only teachers she knew, and muggle substitutes were the only subs. She knew what everyone was thinking, muggle-school kids were freaks. But it wasn't like that with Hermione. Her family was totally normal. Except for the fact that both my parents were Muggles and had spent the last 15 years in muggle London.

In Hermione's life so far, she had lived in 9 different muggle locations. But it wasn't like she didn't have structure growing up. She'd spend all her day at school with other muggles. And then at night, she'd to homework with her Mum. Her favourite subject was always Math, cause with Math, you're either right or wrong. There's no in between. Which is comforting when you live in a crazy place. It had always just been the three of them. And she never thought she'd live any other way. Then it happened.

_"You got it! You got it!" Hermione's mother cried._

_"I really got it?" In all honesty, Hermione had had doubts._

_"You're going to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry!"_

Her articles about the Wizarding world and Magic had earned her a full enrollment at the Wizard School. So it was goodbye, muggle London. Hello Hogwarts.

Hogwarts was a lot like the Muggle world.

"Are you nervous?" Her mother asked, standing on the platform, "It's okay to be nervous. I'm nervous for you. But nervousness is perfectly nervous. Nervous. Nervous. Nervous. Nervous"

Hermione smiled,

"Okay, I'll see you next semester."

At that moment, Hermione turned to the edge of the platform, when the Hogwarts Express pulled up at lightning speed. She was almost hit by it, when her mother gasped.

"I'm okay!" Hermione re-assured her, "Sorry. I'll be careful."

As Hermione entered the train, she heard some loud music blasting, which she had never heard before. She turned to the cabin beside her, and saw a group of black Ravenclaw students looking at her.

"Hi," Hermione said politely.

However, embarassing as it was, the witches and wizards merely stared at her, causing Hermione to keep walking.

In the next cabin, there was a bunch of Quidditch players, (she'd read up on the sport,) fake fighting. The cabin after was full of relaxed students who seemed to be holding what looked like mushrooms in their hands. The smell was ghastly. They looked pretty high. The next, an overweight Hufflepuff eating what seemed to be a very large pumpkin pastie in secret. Hermione found herself with no where to land.

She was glad when she'd finally arrived at the school. Hermione entered her first lesson, Transfiguration. She noticed a mature looking woman stood at the front of the classroom, and approached her.

"Hi, I don't know if anyone told you about me. I'm a new student, my name is Hermione Granger."

The woman, who turned out to be a mature student, looked weirdly Hermione and gave her a look before rudely saying,

"Who cares?"

Hermione had never been so embarassed. She heard two people laughing behind her, and she turned to look at her. The first, was Ginny Weasley. She was an average height, skinny girl with flaming red hair and a messy looking uniform. By her side, was her best friend, Neville. Who was very lanky and definitely gay.

Whilst dismissing their laughter, Hermione went to take a seat.

"You don't want to sit there," called a voice from behind her.

She turned to see it was Ginny.

"Angelina Johnson'll sit there to be next to her boyfriend," she stated plainly.

At that moment, Angelina entered. She was big, and tall, and quite athletic. She must of been on the Quidditch team. Immediately, she leant over and started making out with the boy next to her who was very tiny and looked an awful lot like the muggle character Oliver Twist.

Hermione watched in horror, before moving to the front row seat, before she was interrupted again,

"Don't sit there," It was Ginny, "Do you want to carry attendance sheets to the office every day?"

Reluctantly, Hermione moved on to the third chair.

"No," Ginny said, horrified.

Hermione sighed, turning the girl. She pointed to the boy infront. He was fat, and ugly looking, and from the Slytherin house.

"He farts a lot."

Truthfully, he did look like a guy who would fat a lot, so Hermione got up and sat next to Ginny.

"Thanks," Hermione smiled.

Neville looked over to her, eyeing her cautiously.

"Did you go to Beauxbatons last year?" He questioned. He was definitely gay.

"No," Hermione said.

"-Cause you look like the girl who won House Cup in the Triwizard Tornament."

Hermione had no idea what he was talking about.

"Wasn't me."

"Thank god," Neville sighed, "She had attitude problems."

The red-head girl turned to Hermione.

"This is Neville," she gestured to the boy beside her, "He's almost too gay to function."

With a look of shock and horror, Neville hit Ginny over the back of her head with his textbook.

"Nice to meet you," Hermione said politely.

Finally she'd made a friend.

A tall, dark haired guy also from the Slytherin house walked past the group, turning to Ginny.

"Nice wig, Ginny. What's it made of?" He spat.

People around him burst into laughter. Ginny, however, was quick to reply.

"Your mum's chest hair!" she shouted.

A stern, old and odd looking man walked into the classroom. He had an extremely long, grey beard, very much like his hair. He was also wearing some half moon spectacles. Overall, he was very intimidating. He looked about the classroom for the teacher.

"Where's your Transfiguration teacher?" he asked, his voice low and quaking slightly.

At that moment, in ran what must have been their Professor. She was also quite old, but seemed nicer than the man.

"Okay," she had a broad Scottish accent, "Okay, I'm late so I brought chocolate frogs."

It was then she noticed the head stood in the doorway

"Oh, hi, good morning," she greeted him, a little nervous.

The head, however, dismissed her comment and turned to the class.

"All right. I just want to let every know that we have a new student with us. She just moved here from muggle London.."

Many students turned to look at an odd, weird girl with very long blonde hair and bright blue eyes. She had a dreary expression. Everyone presumed it must have been her.

"Oh," she said, her voice a high pitch, "Don't look at me, I'm from a magic background."

"-So let's help her to adjust to her magical life here at Hogwarts. Her name is," the head continued, looking down at a note card and reading off it, "Hermeon Granger. Where are you Hermeon?"

Hermione raised her hand a little,

"Oh," she said, "That's me. It's pronounced like Hermione."

The class was suddenly a little disinterested.

"My apologies," the old man continued, "I have a nephew named Anfrenee and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact his name is Anfernee."

"Well, welcome Hermione and thankyou, Professor Dumbledore," the teacher smiled.

"You've got to be on time this year, Minerva," Dumbledore lowered his voice, before leaving the classroom.

Chatter erupted again and Ginny turned to Hermione.

"Where are you going first period?" she asked.

Still not quite used to her timetable, Hermione took out a printed roster.

"Sixth Year Magic and Medicine. Room B14."

Ginny looked over to Neville, a glimmer of amusement in her eyes,

"I think that's in the back building," she said to the boy.

He agreed,

"Yeah, that's in the back building."

"We'll take you."

* * *

The corridors were nothing like Hermione had imagined before. Everyone was pressed against everyone, like it or not. Claustrophobia was not an excuse as she was bumped and bashed and squished and squashed against anything that moved, or didn't for that matter. She followed behind Neville, however, who seemed to be keeping his own.

"Watch out!" He called, "New meat coming through."

Hermione followed him and Ginny out of the building, across the Quidditch Pitch. Neville lit a cigarette.

"That's really bad for you," Hermione stated.

Neville merely smiled,

"It keeps me thin," he said, before plopping onto the grass with Ginny.

Hermione was worried. There was no classrooms nearby.

"Where's the back building?" She questioned.

"It burned down in 1987," Ginny said calmly, just as the late bell rang.

"Won't we get in some sort of trouble for this?" Hermione asked.

She really was concerned, and didn't want to be in trouble on her first day.

"If you show up late, yes," Ginny said plainly,

"But if you just don't show up at all," Neville was just as calm, "They'll never even notice."

Hermione guessed she'll never know what she would miss on that first day of Sixth Year Magic and Medicine.

_A tall, mysterious teacher with greasy, long black hair and black robes to match stood in front of a class._

_"Do not have sex," his voice was completely emotionless and he looked as though he wanted to be anywhere but there, "Because you will become pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the 'broomstick position.' Don't have sex standing up. Don't have sex where the witch is on top controlling the pace and friction. Just do not do it, understand?"_

_The class agreed in unison. The teacher was very intimidating._

_"Alright," he confirmed, "Everyone take a spell list."_

_The teacher held out a list of spells that were listed under the 'Contraception' category._

"So you took all these tests and then what?" Neville asked Hermione.

"They placed me in all Sixth Year classes, except for Seventh Year Transfiguration."

Neville seemed to considering what she said, before he spoke,

"I'm repeating Fifth Year Flying."

Ginny looked up from the piece of parchment she was holding.

"How do you spell your name, Hermone?" She asked.

"It's Hermione. H, e, r, m, i, o, n, e."

"-I am so going to mentor you," Neville was off again, "What else is important that I can tell you about? The Great Hall is terrible. You're going to want to get your lunch as quickly as possible. I recommend the cauldron cakes. What else? Oh! The Yule Ball."

"-The Yule Ball is not important," Ginny sounded a little angry.

"It is to me!" Neville cried, "At the end of every year, the graduating Seventh Years throw a dance called The Yule Ball for the other classes. Whomsoever is elected Yule Ball King and Queen automatically become head of the Student Activity Committee and since I am an active member of the S.A.C, I would say, yeah, it's pretty important to me."

Ginny looked at Neville incredulously.

"Neville, you've out-gayed yourself."

Just then, a Flying class began trudging out onto the field.

"In all that is holy. Look at Millicent Bullstrode's Quidditch clothes," Neville murmured.

Millicent Bullstrode, a fat, ugly Slytherin was walking across the field in a horrifying outfit that consisted of overly tight Quidditch pants that were far too small for her figure, and a miniature green tee which revealed her sagging beer-belly.

"Is that a shirt or a fungus growing on her body?" Hermione said, a little shocked at the sight.

"I don't know, Hermone," Ginny said. Would she ever get Hermione's name right? "But I do know that Millicent Bullstode is one of the dumbest girls you will ever meet. Neville sat next to her in Charms last year."

"She asked me how to spell Incendio," Neville looked horrified.

Next onto the field was Astoria, a puny little blonde girl. She is not 'hot' but has expensive clothes.

"And see that little one next to her?" Ginny continued, gesturing to Astoria, "That's Astoria Greengrass. She's rich as shit cause her Dad invented Sugar Quills."

"She's a little Witch Bitch," said Neville.

Hermione frowned,

"What's a Witch Bitch?"

"A girl with 1,000 galleons of designer clothes on a 2 galleon body," Neville confirmed.

Pushing themselves up off the floor, Ginny, Neville and Hermione began walking back to the school.

"Why do you hate them?" Hermione asked.

"What do you mean?" Ginny frowned.

"You seem to really hate them."

"Yes. What's your question?"

"Did they do something to offend you?"

Ginny sighed.

"They're Slytherins. There's nothing they do that doesn't offend me."

She pulled out a folded piece of parchment from her bookbag and handed it to Hermione.

"Here. This is for you," she said.

Hermione looked at the paper. Along the top it said Marauders Map. It was a detailed map of the school saying who belongs where and who was going where.

Ginny noticed the Quidditch teacher had left her bullhorn by the side of the field, and quickly signaled to Neville on his left. He snagged the bullhorn as the passed and right as they entered the doorway he turned it on.

"Sugar Quills causes Dragon Pox!" His voice echoed throughout the hall.

Hermione noticed Astoria looking around. Her face was a cross between confused and angry, but Hermione couldn't quite decipher which. She noticed Ginny and Neville run into the building, so Hermione took the hint to follow too.


	2. Chapter 2

**_A/N: So here's Chapter Two! I'm on fire with this story._**

**_I would also like to make it clear;_**

**_I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE HARRY POTTER CHARACTERS OR THE STORY LINE TO MEAN GIRLS._**

**_Enjoy._**

* * *

_Chapter Two._

Hermione sat in Transfiguration class. It was so weird to be in a real magic classroom, looking at a real magical teacher who wasn't out of a book. Finally, she could focus fully on magical excellence. A boy infront of Hermione turned round, he had blonde hair and pale grey eyes.

"Do you have a quill I could borrow?" he asked.

_Holy shit._

Hermione hastily handed the boy her spare quill and he turned back around. She'd heard rumors and hushed voices concerning him, his name was Draco Malfoy.

Hermione had only had two crushes in her life. One, her Dad's godson who lived in Australia. And one on Dr. Who from the BBC. Give her a break, she lived in the muggle world. She didn't get out much.

But this one hit her like a big Hogwarts Express train.

"Miss Granger," Professor McGonagall called, "What do you have?"

The class turned to look at Hermione, including the boy infront of her. She panicked.

"Oh," she began, "Vera Verto is the incantation of a spell used to transform n animal in a water goblet."

"That's right. Good, very good," the teacher praised.

The boy infront of her looked at Hermione, his mouth curling into a little smirk. She looked down at her paper, and when looking up, she found he was still looking at her.

* * *

Hermione wandered around the Entrance Hall nervously. She began to join a queue which was forming into the Great hall. A small, cheesy guy and his friend approached Hermione in line. She'd heard the boy's name was Seamus Finnigan. He was in Hermione's house.

"Hi," Seamus said, "We're doing a survey of new students. Can you answer a few questions?"

Hermione frowned,

"Um, okay."

"Is your cherry popped?" The boy asked.

Hermione smiled politely, she had no idea what that meant.

"What?" She asked.

Seamus smirked,

"Would you like us to assign someone to pop your cherry?"

"My what?"

A girl intervened. Her name was Pansy Parkinson, she was 15. Her hair was in perfect condition, short and black, she was fast on her feet, intimidating and she seemed to be from the Slytherin house.

"Is he bothering you?" Pansy asked.

She turned to Seamus before Hermione could reply.

"Seamus, why are you such a broomhead?" She spat.

"I'm being friendly to a new student."

He turned to one of the two girls standing beside Pansy. It was Astoria Greengrass.

"What, can't I talk to a new student?" Seamus frowned.

"You were supposed to call me lastnight," the girl stated.

"Seamus," Pansy was talking again, "You do not come to a party at my house with Astoria- and then scam on some innocent girl in front of us two days later! She's not interested,"

Pansy turned to Hermione,

"Do you want to have sex with him?"

Hermione was shocked. She'd never been asked such a blunt question, and never even thought about having sex anyway!

"No, thankyou," Hermione said politely.

"Great. It's settled. Bye, Seamus," Pansy said harshly.

"Shut up," Seamus spat, eyeing Pansy cautiously.

"Good comeback," she said, "You should do stand-up."

Seamus left, defeated. Hermione noticed Pansy mouth the words 'call me' to the boy as he walked away. When he seemed to be out of sight, Hermione turned to the three intimidating girls beside her.

"Thankyou," she said.

Pansy had just about said "You're welcome," before a loud song played over the hall. Something about being a 'Witch for you.'

"Uh oh," the dark haired girl sighed, "That's me."

Two, big, athletic guys sweeped in and picked up Pansy onto their shoulders. The girl waved at people as they carried her towards a make-shift stage in the corner of the Great Hall.

A teacher stood on the stage, talking into a floating microphone.

"Everybody," her voice boomed, "Please give a round of applause for last year's Yule Ball Queen. She kicks off her reign today as head of the Student Activities Committee. Miss Pansy Parkinson!"

There was a large round of applause. So that was the girl's name, Hermione thought. Pansy, now wearing a tiara, took center stage and stood before the mic. She seemed to be very comfortable in her surroundings, and Hermione was in awe.

"Thankyou, Professor Sprout," Pansy smiled, "I just want to say that under my rule, the S.A.C will do more than just sell chocolate frogs and sponsor queer stuff like saving the Nargles,"

A blonde haired girl with blue eyes and a dreamy expression stood beside Hermione, suddenly looked offended,

"-I have plans for some sick parties. My mum knows the people that run the Dragon Preservation Association, so.. yeah," Pansy looked serious again, "But also, it's going to be about building bridges. And being kind to the less fortunate. Where's that little girl I just met?"

Pansy was searching for Hermione's face in the crowd. Hermione could feel a blush growing on her cheeks as she tried to hide her face, but it was too late.

"-Come here!" Pansy cried.

Reluctantly, she went to the foot of the stage. Pansy placed her hand on Hermione's shoulder. She could see Ginny and Neville watching from the other side of the hall, stunned and horrified.

"-This girl is a new student and I'm going to make it my personal responsibility that by the end of the year, she thinks Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry is totally rad!"

With a flick of her wand, Pansy shifted the microphone over to infront of Hermione. Shyly, Hermione cleared her throat,

"Thanks, Pansy."

"You're welcome," Pansy paused, trying to think of Hermione's name, which she did not know, before smiling again, "...girl."

It was about ten minutes later and Hermione was sat at the end of the Slytherin table with Pansy, who was also sat with her best friends, the girls Hermione had seen before, Astoria Greengrass and Millicent Bullstrode.

"-And we only discovered this school two weeks ago-" Hermione was explaining, but was cut off however when Pansy reached forwards and grabbed Hermione's arm to look at her bracelet. It was a wide, brown, leather band with decorative holes punched in it.

"Where did you get that bracelet?" Pansy asked, "I _love _it."

Hermione smiled shyly,

"From a muggle shop."

The girl to the right of Pansy, Astoria, spoke,

"That is _so_ fetch."

With a sigh, Pansy let go of Hermione's arm. She rolled her eyes and turned to Astoria who was sitting looking hopeful.

"What is 'fetch'?" She asked, disdainfully.

Astoria began to wither in her seat a little,

"It's like, slang.. from America..."

Pansy rolled her eyes again. It was then, that the girl sat to the left of Pansy spoke for the first time. Millicent was even more fat and ugly up close, and seemed to have as little common sense as most of the girls did in this place.

"So," she began, in a dreamy voice, "If you're from a muggle family, why are you a witch?"

Astoria gasped, looking at Millicent in shock and horror,

"Oh my god, Millicent! You can't just ask people why they're a witch!"

"-Hermione, could you give us some privacy, for like, one second?" Pansy said, with a sweet smile.

"Sure," Hermione replied.

As the three girls began to gossip in hushed voices, Hermione glanced over to the Gryffindor table, making eye contact with Neville and Ginny. They were wide eyed, and giving Hermione a look as if to say _'What are you doing?!'_. Hermione forced a smile, before turning back to the girls who seemed to be breaking their huddle.

"Okay," Pansy announced, "let me just say that we don't do this a lot, so you should know that this is, like, a huge deal."

"We want to invite you to have lunch with us every day for the rest of the week," Astoria said, finishing Pansy's sentence much to her annoyance.

"Oh," Hermione sighed. She had really expected it to be something a lot bigger than that. "Okay.."

"Great!" Pansy said lightly, "So we'll see you tomorrow-"

"-On Tuesdays, we wear pink," Millicent smiled.

* * *

Hermione, Neville and Ginny were all gathered in the girl's bathroom. Neville shouldn't really have been in there, but he and Ginny assured Hermione that he went in all the time and very rarely got caught. Ginny was hysterically laughing as Hermione explained the day's events,

"You have to do it and tell me all the horrible things they say," she said, pausing for breath.

"I think Pansy seems nice," Hermione said honestly.

She noticed this was a mistake when Ginny practically screamed in Hermione's face,

"Pansy Parkinson is not nice! She is the most sneaky of all The Slytherins."

There was a flush, and Neville appeared from one of the stalls.

"She is fabulous," he confessed, "But she is evil."

A tall, dark haired girl was gathered round a sink. She was from Gryffindor and Hermione had seen her in the common room before. She shrieked when she saw Neville,

"Hey! Get out of here!"

Neville looked at the girl in awe,

"Oh my God! Romilda Vane, I love your work!"

The girl, however, stormed out the bathrooms to Neville's disdain. Ginny and Hermione watched on, before resuming their conversation.

"What would we even talk about?" Hermione questioned Ginny.

"Gilderoy Lockhart," she replied,

"The rising cost of wizard contraception," Neville chipped in.

"-Just do it, please!" Ginny begged.

"-Okay! Okay. Do you have anything Pink?"

Ginny scoffed.

"No," she said, at the same time Neville provided a strong "Yes!"

* * *

Hermione was in her dorm in the Gryffindor Common Room. She was looking through her textbooks when she found her Marauder's map and layed it on the bed to look it over.

A clump of tree's were marked with "Preps."

By the library, "Ravenclaw nerds."

The entrance stepts "Cool Ravenclaws."

By the Herbology sheds, "Herbology Geeks Zone of Confidence."

The Black Lake. A cartooned version of Neville and Ginny holding a sign that says "You are here."

The Great Hall. A cartoon of three Slytherin girls, "_Beware of The Slytherins._"

* * *

It was around lunch time and Hermione was starving. She sat in the Great Hall wearing Neville's pink hair scrunchie - she really couldn't imagine why he owned it- alongside Astoria and Millicent. Having lunch with the Slytherins was like leaving the actual world and entering "Girl World." And Girl World had a lot of rules.

"We only wear school pants or tights on Friday. You can't wear a Jumper two days in a row. You can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week. So, I guess, you picked today," Astoria said, eyeing Hermione's messy ponytail, "And if you break any of these rules you can't sit with us at lunch. I mean, not just you, any of us. Like, if I was wearing school pants today, I would be sitting over there with the Gryffindor freaks."

Astoria cocked her head, gesturing to Ginny and Neville. They were currently having a contest to see who could stick the most pumpkin pasties in their mouth. It looked like fun. Hermione felt a little hurt.

"-We always vote before we ask someone to eat lunch with us, because you have to be considerate of the rest of the group. I mean, you wouldn't buy a skirt without asking your friends first if it looks good on you,"

Hermione frowned, she never really thought about that,

"I wouldn't?" She asked.

"Right!" Astoria dismissed her comment, "It's the same with guys. You may think you like someone, but you could be wrong."

Millicent chipped in,

"Have you seen anyone that you think is cute yet?"

"Actually," Hermione sighed, "There's a guy in my Potions class. Never mind, it's stupid-"

Astoria and Millicent pounced on the information,

"Who is it?" The latter inquired.

"It's a senior?" Astoria presumed.

Hermione shook her head,

"His name is Draco Mafloy-"

"-No!" Astoria cried.

"No, no no!" Millicent shared a similar expression.

"No. You can't like Draco Malfoy. He's Pansy's ex-boyfriend-"

"They went out for a year," Millicent interrupted Astoria,

"And then he broke up with her for no reason-"

"-Because she cheated on him," Millicent spat.

"Regardless," Astoria continued, "Ex-boyfriends are off limits to friends. Don't worry. I will _never _tell Pansy what you said. It'll be our secret."

At that moment, Pansy entered the Great Hall and sat at the Slytherin table.

"Ugh," she moaned, "There's going to be a fire drill in, like, two seconds."

As if by magic, -though probably it was- , the fire alarm went off. All the students around the group ran out of the hall quickly.

"I told Professor Lupin we had to skip it 'cause Millicent might be pregnant."

Millicent laughed, then looked concerned,

"I'm not though, right?" She questioned.

Hermione could see why it was good to have Pansy as a friend. She and the Slytherin threesome had the Great Hall all to themselves.

* * *

Subconsciously, Hermione had been staring at Draco. She watched his plump lips, his stormy grey eyes that had her swooning, his manly, pale hands. Draco looked up at Hermione and smirked. His smirk was almost like his trademark. He made a face as if to say, "This quiz is hard." Hermione nodded in agreement. But the truth was, it wasn't hard at all. Infact, it was easy.

Even if Hermione wasn't allowed to like Draco, she could still look at him.

The bell rang to signal next lesson, snapping Hermione out of her thoughts. The guy next to her, Oliver Wood, dropped a small bag as he passed her. Hermione went to pick it up and was faced with Dean Thomas, a completely nerdy Gryffindor.

"Hey," he greeted Hermione, "You're the Muggle-school girl, right?"

Hermione sighed, this was all she was known for.

"Yeah," she replied.

"I'm the captain of the Hogwarts Arithmancyletes. We participate in Arithmancy challenges against other Magical Schools around the country. And we get twice as much funding from the school if we have a girl. You should think about joining."

"You'd be perfect for it," Professor McGonagall hinted.

Hermione smiled,

"Yeah," she said, "Definitely."

"Great. Let me give you my dorm number,"

Dean pulled out a pre-printed business card that read "Dean Thomas, Arithmacy Enthusiast/Badass MC." Hermione stifled her laughter.

"Think it over." Dean said, "Cause we'd like to get jackets."

He left the classroom and Hermione turned to Professor Snape. She handed him Dean Thomas's bag that she found.

"Professor McGonagall," she cleared her throat, "Oliver dropped his medicine. I have a question-"

"-Hold on," McGonagall silenced her.

She looked suspiciously in the bag at the pills before standing abruptly and leaving the classroom.

* * *

Professor McGonagall and Oliver wood were having a private conversation. Though she knew better, Hermione was listening in from the staircase landing above.

"-Mr Wood you cannot function at school on magic-mushrooms," McGonagall murmured, her voice hushed and serious.

"-I didn't take it. I found it in the Common Room," Oliver pleaded.

"Mr Wood," McGonagall interrupted, "I used to work the night shift in a muggle diner. I'm really quite good at telling when people are high. If you come to my class high again, I **will **know."

Oliver reached out to touch McGonagall.

"Shh.. don't be scared," Wood whispered.

"Urgh," Hermione heard McGonagall scoff, "Mr Wood, would you please remove your hand from my hair."

"Are you gonna turn me into the Head?" Oliver questioned.

"Mr Wood, as much as it pleasures me I don't want you to get kicked out of school. I want you to graduate."

Professor McGonagall and Oliver Wood made a deal that if he didn't come to class high anymore, she wouldn't tell the Head. The teacher left the staircase. Hermione continued watching, unnoticed, as Professor McGonagall went to throw the bag in the trash. Hermione realized then, someone would find it, as did McGonagall, and she retrieved the bag, returning to his classroom and locking it in her drawer. However, Professor McGonagall did call Oliver's parents.


End file.
